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Payday Cash LoanWe cows have been the subjects of literary and literal discrimination for far too long. Did you know that almost anyone who wants to can walk into a quick cash loan store or sign on to a web site like www.cashloancow.com and get a payday cash loan if she wants to, but a cow can't? Is that fair? I don't think so. I think it sucks udders, but that's probably because I am a cow. And I am proud! Why Can't a Cow Get a Payday Cash Loan?"The Man" gives a lot of reasons why a cow can't apply for or obtain a payday cash loan, all of them as bogus and useless as you-know-what's on a bull. I say "give me my cash now ," but no one listens and do you know why they don't listen? Because I'm a COW . They claim all they hear when I talk is a lot of nonsensical mooing, but I know better. I know when I am talking and when I am mooing and I am talking now about payday cash loans and the unconstitutional and discriminatory practices taken against bovines in lending. Here's why they say we cattle can't get an instant cash loan. You Must Have a Job to Get a Payday Cash LoanWhat kind of bull crap is that? A cow can't get a fast cash personal loan because cows can't get jobs. I'll tell you what that is. A conspiracy. Employers conspire to keep cows blacklisted and udderly unemployable unless we go against our heritage and masquerade as oxen and then the payday cash loan industry can feel secure in their discriminatory ways because they have this employment rule. We cows are getting tipped from both sides on that one, I can tell you. Until these unfair practices are changed, no cow will be eligible for a cash loan online of off. They say that in lieu of a verifiable employer, on can have "other verifiable income" of at least a thousand dollars per month and still qualify for a payday cash loan . Isn't that just fine and dandy? Sure it is, for the single mothers, elderly pensioners, and those deemed "unfit" to be self sufficient, but again we cows are left out in the cold like an empty milk bottle. Why? Because we can't get welfare or unemployment either. It is a conspiracy of the most moolevolent kind. You Must Have a Bank Account to Get a Payday Cash LoanYup. We cows are left out on this one too. We can't get bank accounts, so we can't get payday cash loans . Where is the sense in that? They say it's because the funds from the no credit check cash loan are delivered via direct deposit or secured with a personal post-dated check. Of course the cow with a checking account is nowhere to be found. We can't write checks because we can't write and we can't use ATM machines because our hooves are too big for the buttons. We also have no place to carry an ATM card - at least nowhere that would have us wanting to handle it after retrieving it. So, no payday cash loan for a cow. Join the Payday Cash Loan Cow MoovementWe cows are not taking this bad credit cash loan discrimination lying down, however. We're organizing. We're starting a payday cash loan bovine movement. You humans think that we are all these harmless, easily intimidated and docile creatures. Because of this we've been branded, corralled, butchered, and sold as Happy Meals all through history. But the times, they are a-changin'. If you see a cow walking down the street in your town, I suggest you move to the other side of the street because we're mad as hell and we're not gonna take it anymore! Given half the chance, a cow who has been repeatedly denied a payday cash loan will lash out and kill you and everyone you care about. PAYDAY CASH LOANS FOR CATTLE NOW! See The Cash Loan Cow's Recommendations:
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